But there are also many people who have joined what they call, a “Hermit Brigade Coalition,” a new movement that doesn’t want to change back into anything that looks like it did before the Pandemic. They want to stay at home, only connect with people now by Zoom or on spaced out phone calls, and pretend that we are still in lockdown. The causes of this are many. One is, that many people only showered once every three weeks during these last fourteen months, and weren’t into too much teeth brushing, as well. Others, have gained a whole lot of weight, and seem to like it that way. And many others, have made better friends with their pets than they did with any of their human connections in the last few years.
What to do about this? And how to coax these Hermits back into life? July 4th. a fun thing might be, a new government appointed agency, called “Fireworks Go Forth.” They will devise a plan to get messages from disgruntled family members and friends of the “Hermit Brigade,” and then to climb their buildings, or seek out their houses, and bring very loud and very assaulting and wildly colorful small fireworks to be put up against their windows without a break, until the Hermits are forced to come out of hiding, Their families and friends will be waiting for them outside, clapping and screaming, and moving them into busses that will take them to a park with a feast to be shared by all, and a plea for return to life as they as have known it. Many may still be in pajama bottoms or almost naked from the waist down, but no matter.
July 4th is a time of release for many people. It is the window into the summer that we did not get last year. So…let’s hope the “Hermit Brigade,” (a very large band of followers,) will decide to join us.
The only other way to do it is to bring a warrant, and drag them out. But that is plan “B”. Let’s try the Fireworks first…ya?
Happy Fourth, Hip Silvers and of course,
HipSilver Hermits…(We are coming for you!)